


hashtag big damn heroes

by notcaycepollard



Series: hashtag secret agent [6]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Crack, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Gen, and then happened some more, don't start a hashtag trending when you are a secret agent, uh so this happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-16
Updated: 2015-09-16
Packaged: 2018-04-21 02:11:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4810889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notcaycepollard/pseuds/notcaycepollard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>@quakenotthegame: you're a regular ol' human being who already died once. You're on a strictly recon mission. You see Bad Guys Doing Bad Things.</p>
<p>@quakenotthegame: do you a) run into the fray like an idiot, b) run into the fray like an idiot with NO WEAPONS OR GEAR, c) wait for your #SuperheroGirlfriend</p>
            </blockquote>





	hashtag big damn heroes

@quakenotthegame: hey team superhero twitter, lemme ask you a question. a pop quiz, if you will.

@quakenotthegame: you're a regular ol' human being who already died once. You're on a strictly recon mission. You see Bad Guys Doing Bad Things.

@quakenotthegame: do you a) run into the fray like an idiot, b) run into the fray like an idiot with NO WEAPONS OR GEAR, c) wait for your #SuperheroGirlfriend

@capsicle: @quakenotthegame I think @bbarnes15 can probably attest to me doing b) categorically since 1925.

@gotmywings: @capsicle @quakenotthegame @bbarnes15 And I can sure back that up based on, oh, MY ENTIRE LIFE NOW.

@iamironman: @quakenotthegame My suits are mobile. I'm always equipped with weapons and gear.

@hawkeyeguy: @quakenotthegame do i get arrows? because, arrows.

@quakenotthegame: Ugh superhero twitter. I legit mean actual human beings. Maybe this was the wrong polling group. You don't count, Cap, you're as idiot-brave as he is.

@darcingaround: @quakenotthegame if I can take my taser in with me, I'm going b) all the way

@quakenotthegame: Well at least I know everyone I associate with is a Gryffindor idiot.

 

@quakenotthegame: SOMEONE was a Big Damn Hero today and nearly got themselves killed, not naming any names, Philip J Coulson

@hawkeyeguy: @irunthejoint ooooohhhhh she went with the full name, must be bad

@irunthejoint: @hawkeyeguy I was your SO for twelve years, Barton, don't make me come back there.

@hawkeyeguy: @irunthejoint you faked your own death to get away from us, sir, i don't think you'll come back

@irunthejoint: @hawkeyeguy Don't be so sure.

@irunthejoint: @hawkeyeguy At least you'd let me be a damn hero occasionally without giving me stern looks.

@quakenotthegame: @irunthejoint I am JUST SAYING that this whole thing where you do recon does not appear to finish with you ever sticking on recon

@quakenotthegame: @irunthejoint Get a rocket launcher installed in your robot hand, or something, at least.

 

@quakenotthegame: you know those scenes where the blushing princess swoons and the dashing hero has to catch her in his big capable arms?

@quakenotthegame: because I'm not saying that that DIDN'T happen today

@quakenotthegame: (I was not the princess in this scenario)

@darcingaround: @quakenotthegame omg please tell me it was #DirectorBoyfriend

@quakenotthegame: @darcingaround of course it was #DirectorBoyfriend

@darcingaround: @quakenotthegame y'all need to start videoing your missions. For, like, science. And popcorn eating gif-making.

@irunthejoint: @quakenotthegame @darcingaround I am not your swooning princess, Skye.

@quakenotthegame: @irunthejoint Own it, Phil.

 

@irunthejoint: Okay so who left this princess hat on my desk, huh.

@irunthejoint: It has a wispy scarf thing?

@irunthejoint: I really don't think it'll go with any of my suits.

@irunthejoint: I CAN HEAR YOU ALL SNICKERING OUT THERE HUNTER I KNOW THIS WAS YOU.

 

@quakenotthegame: @irunthejoint Seriously babe this rescuing you thing is getting out of control.

@quakenotthegame: @irunthejoint I'm gonna bribe @iwantacapuchin to put a tracker in your robot hand.

@quakenotthegame: @irunthejoint On the up side, did you see how awesome my new suit looked?

@irunthejoint: @quakenotthegame Yes, you looked very heroic and brave. Now can you bring me those donuts? I'm wounded, here.

@quakenotthegame: @irunthejoint That depends. What am I?

@irunthejoint: @quakenotthegame Ugh must we?

@quakenotthegame: @irunthejoint say it, Coulson.

@irunthejoint: Fine. Hey superhero twitter, @quakenotthegame is totally the Dream Hero of our relationship. I am the Swooning Princess.

@quakenotthegame: @irunthejoint I mean I AM #SuperheroGirlfriend after all. 

 

@darcingaround: @quakenotthegame so do you make him wear the princess hat in bed or what

@quakenotthegame: @darcingaround check your snapchats :)

**Author's Note:**

> imagine Skye rescuing Coulson like he's a damsel in distress though
> 
> imagine it
> 
> (wait we don't need to imagine it because it totally already happened and it was a beautiful thing, thanks, writers)


End file.
